Why We Gather
We are designed to be in community together. To be embodied. To be present, physically, emotionally, spiritually. To belong.
Over dinner recently with another couple, we got into a lively conversation about the influence of technology today.
I’m generally optimistic about technology as a tool to help us improve our lives and society, but there is no denying that technology also transforms us, sometimes in negative ways.
As a middle school educator, my wife, Heather, is witnessing some of the worst effects of dependency on technology, particularly on young people. For example, a student recently told her that they hate going to other friends’ houses. When asked why, they said it’s because everyone stares at their phones the whole time. They are physically together, but completely absent.
Author John Dyer writes about the paradoxical role that technology plays in both connection and disconnection in From the Garden to the City. Dyer gives the example of a book as a piece of technology that connects two people – the author and the reader. While that connection is powerful and has shaped the world, it’s also imperfect and a form of disconnection, since it separates the author from the reader.
This article that you are reading is a form of technology – it functions as an interface between you and me. I’m grateful for the thousands of leaders who I get the chance to communicate with each week through The Wave Report.
And yet, the very technologies that connect us also put something between us and can lead to our disconnection. The more connected we are to our technology and the interfaces that come between us, the more disconnected we can become from one another.
That’s why I believe that it’s never been more important to gather together in person. We are designed to gather, whether that’s coffee with a colleague, dinner with a friend, a conference, or events like the upcoming Sustainable Giving Workshop that we’re hosting later this summer.
On the surface, the Sustainable Giving Workshop is a training event, designed to equip nonprofit fundraisers with principles and high-impact strategies to develop a plan for growing recurring giving.
But it’s so much more than that. It’s an environment designed to create connection and community. To inspire creative thinking and exploration. To have the space to think deeply and return refreshed, with renewed clarity and vision.
Above: The Sustainable Giving Workshop is designed to be part workshop, part summit, part retreat – ALL experience. We’ve just added discounts for additional team members and a companion ticket if you’d like to bring a “plus one.”
When we gather in person and connect in community, many benefits come from being together:
1. Gathering Causes a Change of Environment
Years ago, the agency where I served as Executive Vice President secured an office lease in the Pioneer Square area of downtown Seattle.
Our HQ was in the small town of Poulsbo, Washington, where we live, but once a month, I would work from our downtown office. It was a hassle to get over there, but there was something about getting into a new environment, a change of scenery. Riding the ferry across the beautiful Puget Sound. Walking through the city. Sitting at a coffee shop. Connecting with colleagues. It was always a refreshing burst of energy and creativity to step out of my familiar comfort zone.
Today, I get to travel the country and sometimes the world. In the past few months, I’ve spent time in Dallas, Maui, Myrtle Beach, Portland, Phoenix, and Seattle. I don’t necessarily love the process of traveling, but I find that when I’m in different environments, I’m energized and I see things differently.
💡 Takeaway: Gathering requires a change in environment, leading to fresh perspectives that emerge from leaving our familiar surroundings, patterns, and distractions.
2. Gathering Creates Space for Reflection
When we have our heads down in our day-to-day, with our “nose to the grindstone,” it can be really hard to see what is happening around us, let alone get our eyes up to the horizon and see what is coming next.
I don’t know about you, but when I’m on my home turf, there are always reasons to fill my time. The demands of being “on,” whether at home or work, often crowd out the whitespace that I believe is essential for us to be able to think clearly and see things that we might not otherwise see in the grind of our day-to-day.
💡 Takeaway: Gathering gives us the space to reflect, to see more clearly what is happening around us, and to look to what’s coming on the horizon.
3. Gathering Strengthens Weak Ties
Last month, I attended my first AFP ICON, the world's largest annual conference for professional fundraisers. More than 3,000 fundraising professionals gathered in Seattle to focus on topics like AI, leadership, and innovative fundraising strategies.
I was honored to speak a couple of times and to host a celebration for the book launch at THE historic ACT Theatre in downtown Seattle (I still can hardly believe it), surrounded by old and new friends alike.
But what I loved most about attending such a prominent conference for the first time was how it created opportunities to deepen relationships. After the event, I reflected on LinkedIn:
When “Weak Ties” Become “Strong Ties” ❤️
One of my favorite concepts in network theory is the idea of weak ties — those people you know, but not deeply. Acquaintances. Occasional collaborators. LinkedIn connections you admire from afar.
And then something happens. You meet. You talk. You share a moment. And a weak tie becomes a strong one. 💪
That happened again and again this week at #AFPICON — my first ever, after 20 years in fundraising.
I finally met so many people I’d only known through screens, and had the joy of going deeper. Real conversations. Real connection. Real community.
Weak ties are where innovation lies – it’s getting outside yourself, outside your bubble, and you get exposed to different people. Different ideas. Different backgrounds.
💡 Takeaway: Some of the most powerful relationships and innovative ideas come from deepening our “weak ties,” those informal or casual connections that can lead to deep community and breakthrough thinking when we gather.
4. Gathering Creates Community and Connection
When we gather, community forms. We get to create something that might not have been there before. Shared interests become shared passions. Life is exchanged.
As much as the internet has done for us to find other people in our tribe, there is a reason the most vibrant communities find ways to gather in person.
I get great satisfaction and joy from bringing together leaders and fundraisers around shared passions – growing sustainable recurring giving, creating community, and cultivating breakthrough innovation.
💡 Takeaway: Nothing can replace in-person connection and the power of gathering to form community.
5. Gathering Helps us Cultivate an Outside Mindset
Each of us are experts in one topic or another, and that’s a problem.
Don’t get me wrong – expertise is a beautiful gift. I’m so grateful for 20 years of fundraising and marketing experience that enables me to help organizations grow recurring giving.
However, the problem with expertise arises as our expertise increases, the narrower our field of view tends to be. Expertise leads to increased confidence. As we become more confident that our particular expertise is the solution to the problem, we can become prone to not seeing other approaches.
The antidote to the problem of expertise is cultivating what I call an “Outside Mindset.” An outside mindset is something that we can cultivate to see beyond ourselves, our sector, and our areas of expertise.
An outside mindset:
⚡ Leads with curiosity.
⚡ Is open to new ideas.
⚡ Pays attention to the outside world.
⚡ Cultivates diverse relationships.
⚡ Seeks outside perspectives.
⚡ Attends events outside one’s sector (gets out of their environment).
⚡ Reads resources and listens to content
💡 Takeaway: Breakthrough innovation requires getting outside of conventional approaches, ways of thinking, and ways of solving problems. Consider what you are doing to nurture an Outside Mindset.
That’s why, later this summer, I’m hosting the Sustainable Giving Workshop – a gathering of fundraisers passionate about growing sustainable recurring giving.
The Sustainable Giving Workshop
This September 10-12, 2025, I’m hosting a gathering of fundraisers who want to grow sustainable recurring giving. The Sustainable Giving Workshop is a 2.5-day experience designed for nonprofit leaders who are ready to move from hopeful to intentional when it comes to recurring giving.
I believe our sector truly needs a space like this for nonprofit fundraisers to step back, think deeper, and walk away with a clear, customized plan to grow sustainable giving.
Part workshop. Part summit. Part retreat. ALL experience.
Space is limited, and we are currently offering a Super Early Bird rate ($400 off) – available only until June 15. You can learn more + grab your spot at www.imago.consulting/workshop.
Additional Team Member Discounts and Companion Tickets
Several people have asked me if there are discounts available for multiple team members or if we offer a special non-attendee rate for individuals who wish to bring a spouse to join all social events and excursions, but not the training content.
I’m happy to announce today that we are making both available!
After your first registration, additional Team Members receive an extra $200 off the current registration price, and we’ve added a “Bring a Companion” Ticket option for $245 for anyone who wants to bring a plus one to enjoy the beautiful late summer Seattle weather and social events with the group.
I hope to see you there!
💡 Takeaway: Gathering is essential to our humanity. Gathering creates community. Gathering cultivates an outside mindset and can lead to breakthrough thinking. We are made to gather.
Until next week… Surf’s Up! 🌊
- Dave
P.S. We launched a podcast last week! The Sustainable Giving Podcast went live last Saturday, on the 210th anniversary of recurring giving in North America. If you haven’t subscribed, you can do so on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify.
About the Author | Dave Raley
Consultant, speaker, and author Dave Raley is the founder of Imago Consulting, a firm that helps nonprofits and businesses who serve nonprofits create profitable growth through sustainable innovation. He’s the author of the book The Rise of Sustainable Giving: How the Subscription Economy is Transforming Recurring Giving, and What Nonprofits Can Do to Benefit. Dave also writes a weekly innovation and leadership column called The Wave Report, and the co-founder of the Purpose & Profit Podcast — a show about the ideas at the intersection of nonprofit causes and for-profit brands. Connect with Dave on LinkedIn.
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